Hungry Kids, Stuffed Church

I hesitated putting this on my blog, because I don't want to "guilt" anyone into anything they don't feel called to do. I am just asking people to think, especially this holiday season before going out and spending $$$$ like crazy on stuff we don't need. Every little bit we can do to help someone else honors our Lord and pleases him and that alone should motivate us to give to those who need it most.

16!!

Yep- got the official call Wednesday night that we are indeed #16 on the list for siblings & or a single boy. Our case manager said again that they just are not getting many siblings into Hannah's Hope and that it is very likely that we will be matched with just one child. I am praying about this as it is different from what "my plan" has been all along. But really, I am at peace with this too. We have put our trust in the Lord from the beginning in this process, so who are we to start questioning God's plan now? He knows what we can handle and what is best for our family. So, we wait - kind of like waiting to find out if you are having twins or not, except the wait time to find out can't be put on the calendar like you can with an ultrasound!

Since I shared my favorite number (27) a while back- I should mention that 16 is Jon's favorite (high school football jersey # :) And no, we did not dress up in our old high school garb just to show we are #16 on the list. This photo is from Jon's 40th (80's themed) birthday party a year and a half ago. I should have shared more photos back when, but then some of you may have chosen to stop checking out my blog!

At a loss for words

I know I haven't been a very good blogger lately. There has been such little activity for us with the adoption, but I thought I'd at least post where we are UNOFFICIALLY at on the waiting list. I checked it today and it said 18! Wow- things have been moving quickly during the last few weeks. Honestly, it gets scarier as we get closer.

I had a nice talk with a friend today, and in my speaking out loud, I realized how great our kids are and what great helpers they will be. When the first 3 were little, it was hard. Hard to get out of the house, hard to prepare meals, hard to have any quiet in the house, hard to have any awake/alone time with Jon, just plain hard..... some days. I know this will be hard too, but I have helpers now! Helpers with keeping the little guys entertained, getting them a snack, reading them books, picking out clothes, showing them that brushing teeth is fun!

Please continue to pray for us as we wait and for our little boys - that God is preparing their hearts to join us soon!

A broken heart

For about four years now God has put the love of orphans on my heart and giving him all the glory, he has lead us to adopt. But with this, comes the reality. And it is haunting...

• The reality that approximately 24,000 children are STARVING to DEATH every day. Once you really grasp that concept, you will never forget it.
  

• The reality that babies are being abandoned on the streets because there is no food.

• The reality that moms and dads have no choice but to give their precious children away.

• The reality that even though God has led us to adopt, our little boys will grieve and suffer tremendously before we get to bring them home.

• The reality that today, we don't know where our boys are, who is caring for them, if they are being fed, clothed, loved.

• The reality that this is going to be really hard.

I haven't felt this way, or thought this deep in quite some time. Today my heart is literally broken and aching. I don't know what is going on, but recently, I feel like something is happening, like our boys are at a critical time right now, that they are grieving, feeling abandoned, lost and lonely. Please pray for them, that they would feel God's comfort and hope and peace.

But God works in awesome ways. After taking the kids to school, I was planning on going to work out this morning, but an awful pain in my hip kept me up overnight, so I came home and decided to lay low instead. I caught up on some of my favorite blogs and turned on Family Life Today. I love that program so much, but don't listen as often as I used to. Today the program happened to be about adoption, go figure, with one story specifically about adoption from Ethiopia. I cried through most of it, BUT GOD was speaking to me, just when I needed it and was feeling at my lowest.

• God has promised that he will protect our boys.

• God has promised he will be with our family through this all; financially, emotionally, physically, spiritually.

• God has promised that he will draw us even closer to him through the adoption, that our faith will grow, that we will share his son Jesus with those who are lost- what a blessing to us!

• God has promised this adoption will bless us, and those around us as much as it will bless the boys: "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

• God has promised that even though this will be hard, we can cast all of our worries and anxieties on him and he will care for us. 1 Peter 5:7

• God has shown us that only $38.00 a month + (plus) prayer - (minus) one meal out to eat for our family of 5 = (equals) supporting a little boy named Isreal and his family of 9 for an entire month. (food, medicine, clothing, education, home supplies, etc.)

• God has taken away our urge for many of the "must have" earthly desires, because he has shown us the true desire of our hearts; "defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy, deliver them from the hand of the wicked." Psalm 82:3-4

GOD IS AWESOME!!!

If you have the opportunity to check it out- PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE listen to Family Life Today's radio broadcast. Please continue to pray if you feel led to adopt, or sponsor a child, or give financially to an orphanage, or look into foster care. You never know what God can do through you unless you ask!

On a happy note- we are now officially number 26 on the sibling waiting list!

AND...

Today is my precious little one's birthday. Before I had my children, my younger sister Kara was "my little one". She is 35 today and is as beautiful as ever, inside and out. She is my only sibling and God got it right when he created her! She is supportive, honest, loving, caring, humble, dedicated, feisty. She motivates me to be a better person and loves me unconditionally. Thank you my dear, sweet sister, my best friend. I love you! Happy Birthday!

It is so NOT about me.....

Hi y'all

I know, I know, I am not even close to being southern, so why do I start with y'all? Because I secretly covet the cute southern girl accent. We in central Wisconsin do not have accents. We have our plain, boring "hi, how are you" voices. Don't worry, I don't dwell on this daily or anything, it was just a random thought I had tonight and decided to share. But if you see me and I say hi y'all, you'll know why!

Anyway- on to explain the title of my post. There is a t-shirt that hangs in the club where I work out and I see it every time I am there. In big letters it says "It's All About Me!" I despise that t-shirt, because life is so NOT all about me, or you, or my hubby, or my kids, or my friends.

Our culture tells us on t-shirts, in commercials, in magazines that it IS about us, that we deserve the best and the recognition because we work hard, right? The spotlight should fall here because I got good grades, I helped a neighbor in trouble, I volunteer at my church, I got a promotion at my job, I excel in sports. You name it, we are looking for praise from the world for what "I" have done. (I am generalizing of course. Not everyone thinks this way all the time, but subconsciously our sinful nature kicks in and we all feel this way once in a while.) But when it comes right down to it, "I" have done nothing. Without God, "I" alone can do nothing. However, God promises: "I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Phillipians 4;13. What an awesome reminder that not only can I do anything through God, but that is the ONLY way I can do anything.

This process of adoption has taught us so much about this passage in the Bible. We are not going to be able to do this on our own. We have and will continue to totally and completely lean on the Lord and His Word for his guidance, for strength, courage, patience and hope. We are not looking for a pat on the back or for anyone to tell us we are doing a great thing by adopting. We want all the honor and glory to go to the Lord, who put this desire in our hearts.

Honestly though, sometimes it still seems very surreal to me that this is going to happen. I go about my day, happily enjoying my three precious ones, even having time to myself on occasion to read, exercise, spend alone time with my hubby, visit with friends or hang out with my mom and sister. And then I do start to think "Maybe It IS All About Me?!?!". I've put in the 10 years of hard time, now I "deserve" some rest - right?". And selfishly, I think to myself, "do I really want to give up this new-found 'freedom' I have just found?"

And then God quickly puts me in my place and reminds me, like he did today with a sick child, that his purpose for me on this earth is to lovingly serve my children, to nurse them back to health, to love them unconditionally, to teach them to live for Jesus; to be their mom. If he chooses to bless me with one or two more precious little ones, I will be so honored, and work my hardest to share with them early on what it has taken me more than 35 years to figure out:

" It is ALL about Him".

******JJ- thanks for your inspiration and advice. You truly are a great mother and example! May God continue to bless your journey in motherhood!******

27 is my favorite number!

OK - for selfish reasons, this is my favorite number b/c my birthday is February 27th and my firstborn's is July 27th, but we are officially number ******27****** on the waitlist, and it gets even better! We have also received our FDL -Favorable Determination Letter from USCIS (Immigration), stating we can move forward with the adoption!

We are super thrilled because these last few months with little to no change has been hard. It's not that we are anxious or can't endure the wait, to be honest, it has allowed the devil to work in our minds and raise a little doubt. For 5 months we worked on paperwork, ran here and there and then everything stopped and the waiting began. Jon and I talked about this and we know and still believe we are doing the right thing and are excited for our family, yet the fear of the unknown still exists.

AGCI assured us that summer and Christmas are the two most difficult times in the waiting game. Honestly summer wasn't too bad because we were so busy. For me, it will be the school year b/c all my precious ones will be at school and I will be on my own. I am trying to decide how to fill my days this school year, between volunteering and keeping up with the house and getting the kids where they need to be after school I am already busy, but I know God wants me to be doing something else. I feel the calling to facilitate another bible study, since the first one went so well. I also have thought about leading a prayer group at school to pray for our children and teachers. Both of these could easily fit into my schedule, I just need to stop procrastinating and start planning.

Sorry it's been so long since my last post. We truly are having a wonderful, busy summer and I just don't get to sit down at the computer much anymore.

We're still here!

I know- it's been too long. Life got in the way of blogging over the last month, but for a good reason. Jon and I were able to take a vacation together, just the two of us, and it was great. We spent 5 nights in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic and honestly, it was the most relaxing vacation I've ever been on. We didn't leave the resort for any excursions, and didn't even participate in any resort games. We simply sat, read, swam, ate and slept...... oh, and Jon threw up, A LOT. We had one day where Jon was sick, we think from Caesar Salad dressing. Anyway, we loved the time together and big thanks to our parents and my sister for keeping the kids.


Well, no big news to report on the adoption. We are now #30 on the list waiting for siblings. Not too encouraging - since we were #31 a month ago. But again, we are confident God has a plan and that he is acting on it even if we can't see any progress. On a good note, we have our USCIS appointment in Milwaukee scheduled for June 30th to get fingerprinted again. This will be my third time getting printed and hopefully the last. Jon and I will have to make a day of it since our appointments are three hours apart. Thank you to those who have offered your prayers and congratulations. Your support means so much to us!

In other news, we are proud to report that Payton had an awesome couple of weekends in baseball. Last weekend he played in a tournament in Ripon and their 9U team took first place. This weekend they played here at home and they took second. For the most part he did great. He is pitching in his first year of kid-pitch and is doing really good. We are most proud of his attitude and character, letting his light shine for Christ as he shows respect for the officials, his coaches and teammates, displays good sportsmanship and genuinely just loves to play the game. Way to go buddy!